I haven't written in weeks… It hasn't been due to writer's block, but rather the fear of judgement. I've had all these topics floating around in my head but have stopped myself from sharing because I didn't want to alienate anyone or make them feel uncomfortable. Isn't that silly? Silly but true. Why are we so afraid to share our inner truths?
I'm spending the week in a beautiful log home in northern Michigan with my family. All the cousins are together and there is constant chatter and laughter. The soundtrack of innocence and the essence of childhood. They are unapologetically authentic and vulnerable.
Where along the spectrum of maturing did we learn to let the fear of judgment lead us to hide those parts of ourselves that we deem shameful, or "bad"? How did we develop a culture of perfection? One that values the image we project over the authenticity and rawness of our humanity? What if we celebrated our diversity beyond the color of our skin, ethnicity, religion, or sexuality, but also celebrated each other's unique story of brokenness and hurts? What would it look like if we encouraged one another to embrace that which makes us unique, even if that includes our brokenness? Or better yet, what if we didn't label those qualities "imperfections" or "brokenness"? What if they were just another part of the richness and depth that makes us who we are? What freedom we would feel to be fully and openly our true selves. And maybe those parts that we feel the urge to keep in the darkness protected from judgment would experience healing in the warmth and light of love and acceptance.
I've wanted to share about my struggles with my body image. I've wanted to share about coming to terms with my diagnosis of bipolar type 2 disorder. I've wanted to share about my fears and confusion surrounding my decision to proceed with a second divorce. I've wanted to share about the evolution from shame to humility and eventually gratitude while going through a bankruptcy. But these are topics cloaked in shame, uncomfortable to talk about and perhaps even more uncomfortable to hear. They are taboo. They are better left tucked away and unseen.
But there is such power in speaking your truth aloud. The very act of bringing the truth to light releases so much shame. It afford us the freedom to sit with ourselves exactly where we find ourselves in life without the pressure to move towards resolution and the perception of "wholeness". It allows our secrets to be transformed into our truth. It allows us to love ourselves just as we are, which is often the first step towards acceptance which can ultimately lead to change.
So this is my fair warning; uncomfortable, squirm in your seat, make you cringe topics coming up. Bear with me, experience the discomfort with me. Maybe there will be pieces of my story you can relate to or empathize with. Or maybe we'll disagree. Maybe we'll discover some truths about ourselves. And maybe, just maybe, we will uncover some unexpected beauty.
I'm spending the week in a beautiful log home in northern Michigan with my family. All the cousins are together and there is constant chatter and laughter. The soundtrack of innocence and the essence of childhood. They are unapologetically authentic and vulnerable.
Where along the spectrum of maturing did we learn to let the fear of judgment lead us to hide those parts of ourselves that we deem shameful, or "bad"? How did we develop a culture of perfection? One that values the image we project over the authenticity and rawness of our humanity? What if we celebrated our diversity beyond the color of our skin, ethnicity, religion, or sexuality, but also celebrated each other's unique story of brokenness and hurts? What would it look like if we encouraged one another to embrace that which makes us unique, even if that includes our brokenness? Or better yet, what if we didn't label those qualities "imperfections" or "brokenness"? What if they were just another part of the richness and depth that makes us who we are? What freedom we would feel to be fully and openly our true selves. And maybe those parts that we feel the urge to keep in the darkness protected from judgment would experience healing in the warmth and light of love and acceptance.
I've wanted to share about my struggles with my body image. I've wanted to share about coming to terms with my diagnosis of bipolar type 2 disorder. I've wanted to share about my fears and confusion surrounding my decision to proceed with a second divorce. I've wanted to share about the evolution from shame to humility and eventually gratitude while going through a bankruptcy. But these are topics cloaked in shame, uncomfortable to talk about and perhaps even more uncomfortable to hear. They are taboo. They are better left tucked away and unseen.
But there is such power in speaking your truth aloud. The very act of bringing the truth to light releases so much shame. It afford us the freedom to sit with ourselves exactly where we find ourselves in life without the pressure to move towards resolution and the perception of "wholeness". It allows our secrets to be transformed into our truth. It allows us to love ourselves just as we are, which is often the first step towards acceptance which can ultimately lead to change.
So this is my fair warning; uncomfortable, squirm in your seat, make you cringe topics coming up. Bear with me, experience the discomfort with me. Maybe there will be pieces of my story you can relate to or empathize with. Or maybe we'll disagree. Maybe we'll discover some truths about ourselves. And maybe, just maybe, we will uncover some unexpected beauty.
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